Monday, May 25, 2009

Ultrasound #2 Update

So as most of you know, we had another ultrasound last Thursday (sorry it took me so long to update, been a little crazy). As you can all see, our little blob is doing just fine. The heartbeat was clearly visible again and was 132 BPMs. Everything was measuring perfectly and Egg Basket's exam was great. She hasn't gained any weight yet, which she is very happy about :) We go back to the doctor on June 19th (countdown). That will likely just be an exam and a conversation between the doc and the three of us (Egg Basket, me and my husband) about which tests we want to have done.
There are some "screening test" which could give us some indications about the baby's health, but are not definitive. Still, they carry no risk. Then there are two options for definitive tests (with much lower false positives) that carry a quarter percentage point risk of causing a miscarriage...decisions, decisions..My husband and I are currently discussing, but I think are most likely to go with the CVS..that good news is that we will then find out the sex of the baby earlier :) So take the poll and let me know your guess. For the record, Ethan's mom has 3 boys, his brother has two boys, and Ethan's grandmother (father's mother) had two boys...and of course, we already have a son...hmm, who is the betting type? are we doing? Well, as usual, Egg Basket is "fine"..I think she is tired, but she just planned and pulled off an amazing party for her son's graduation from college for 100 people! As for us, we are excited and still a bit anxious. We told our son because he was worried that Egg Basket had been "stung by a bee and was allergic" and that was why we had to go see her to take her to the doctor. He appears to be very excited (although he did stop and ask again how "our baby got in her [Egg Basket's] tummy"..I told him the doctor put it there :) My husband is a little worried that he is gonna think a bee sting gets you pregnant! Brings a whole new meaning to the birds and the bees! Still, gonna be a long 8 months waiting for this baby :)
As for current hang up is that the baby isn't gonna know my voice, never mind that he/she's first word is gonna be some form of "yuck" :). Seriously, it has now been suggested on 3 separate occasions that this is the way to go, have someone else carry your baby...I know people mean well, but I repeat, NO ONE CHOOSES THIS WAY. Some days it is a bit harder than I thought it would be. Let me tell you, Egg Basket is amazing and totally gets it. She makes the doctor direct comments and questions to me, tells the nurse to make sure I can see the screen, etc. She never makes me feel inferior or secondary to this process...but sometimes it is hard to think that my baby will think I am a stranger when I first hold him/her. I am thinking about making some recordings and having her play it to her stomach (I promised no singing!). Still, it is the little things that remind me that this is so different...specifically, I never thought about this before!
It sometimes seem surreal, like is it really happening, finally? I have been told (repeatedly) that in 8 months when I hold that baby, none of this will matter...really? Isn't this process part of who we are? Part of our child's story? I believe it is the journey and not the destination, so this is part of the journey..of how together, as a team, two friends (and our families) really are participating in our very own journey of life. Complete with complex emotions, fear, doubt, anxiety and love.

Thursday, May 14, 2009

Ultrasound #1 Update

So wiseguys..only 4 of you were right! The ultrasound this morning showed one very strong heartbeat...they searched around, but alas, only one.

The heartbeat was 117 BPM...very good for so early (The heartbeat is between the X's).

We are thrilled!

Egg Basket still feels fine...more to come later with new poll.

P.S.- I am an idiot who can't you may have noticed, I fixed the last post- we are really *6* weeks and 3 days (not 5 weeks)...hooray..I just gained a week :)

Monday, May 11, 2009

6 Weeks take a guess...

So in order to amuse myself, (but mostly Egg Basket) I updated the ticker and added a poll. My husband and I will be heading to CT on Wednesday evening for the 7am ultrasound on Thursday morning (I think infertility docs don't sleep!) to look at "placement and number"...the docs fancy way of saying are they/is it in the right place and how many are there?

We are both excited and nervous. The doctor called to say it was unlikely that we'd see a heartbeat because it is early (We will be 6 weeks and 3 days), but that the ultrasound is important for placement and number...that funny little word *number* makes my heart skip a beat. Could we really have hit the jackpot? Are we that lucky? (For the record, we go back up the following Thursday, May 21st for the next ultrasound to see heartbeat(s)- no nerve wracking here, right?)

As you all know, my not so secret wish was for many have asked, will I be disappointed if it isn't? My answer: For about 30 seconds and then I expect to be so overcome with gratitude and relief that there is one, that I will be ecstatic! As for IF it is twins, well after my husband changes his pants, we will be ecstatic too (Okay, I know, TMI..but he TOO is excited and nervous)..we'd be crazy not to be nervous..after all, it has been almost 7 years since we had a baby...two? woah...we also like to sleep...

That brings up my next thought...My husband and I are both TERRIBLE morning people (just ask Egg Basket!) and hate waking up early (That is why the 7am ultrasound is a mean joke!)..well our darling 6 year old was (Thankfully, hallelujah!) born with our genes and sleeps late (I know this opens me up for serious hate)..and of course he is 6, so even when he wakes up before us (at like 9am) he heads down and turns on the TV and gets himself breakfast...ahh heaven! BUT the totsicles (we also refer to them FHB - Future Human Baby (ies)) do not share my genes..we have a donor..and somehow I forgot to ask if she was a morning person! I can just picture it..two that wake up at 5am! Wonder how *jackpot-ish* I will think it all is then :)

Okay, in all seriousness..take the poll..curious what you all are guestimating..I mean from 485 to 1584 in less than 48 hours was a pretty good increase. And for the record the doc says "it IS very high and EB is VERY fertile" in response to my question of what did he think!

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

"Victory is the sweetest, when you've known defeat"

... Indeed... Baby Mama and her husband have known defeat... particularly in this long journey.
And now, we can begin to breathe just a bit easier.

Some of you have followed us on Facebook and know that (like the impatient people that we are) Baby mama and I tested with a home test WAY too early and got the expected negative.
Of course that only prompted us to continue to test.... daily....
And we continued to get negative results.
On Thursday, the 30th Baby Mama contacted the fertility clinic to ask them to push the beta test from Monday to Friday.
We were not hopeful at that point. The nurse told us that this was probably an indication of what we should expect, and we began to prepare for the worst.
Thursday was a crappy day for all of us as we all went through a variety of emotions.
We began to prepare our closest friends for the likelihood that this was not a successful transfer.
Since I had one leftover test, I decided to use it on Friday morning ... this test was positive... I nearly fell over when I was the result!
Of course my camera phone was not cooperating, so I had my daughter take a picture of the test, and send it to Baby Mama.
Needless to say, she and her hubby were equally shocked!
I had a very long day in court, and then went to the lab for my beta... at that point we wouldn't have the results until Saturday morning!

After a very harrowing morning involving Baby Daddy stalking the fertility clinic... LOL... we got our first number.... 50.

A follow up test was scheduled for Monday. I JUST made the morning pick-up! by 3 that afternoon, we were at almost 500!
They were looking for a number of 100...
And here we are... Wednesday.
For today's blood test we were looking for close to double (around 1000). since it would actually be only about 45 hours and not the full 2 days, I told Baby Mama that I am sure it would be fine if we hadn't completely doubled our numbers...
That didn't turn out to be a problem....
Today's number was a whopping 1584... more than triple!

What does this all mean, you may ask....

Right now, we are awaiting further instructions from SGFC.
We may have another blood test on Friday, or we may jump straight to the ultrasound sometime within the next couple of weeks... until then, we know that we have success... the unknown... is how much success... whatever it is though, we'll take it!

“A single event can awaken within us a stranger totally unknown to us. To live is to be slowly born.”
~ Antoine de Saint-Exupery~